Sister Faustina Kowalska: Her LIfe and MIssion

"in your present condition, untfi a d the torments o f souC you are e^eriencing you not onty do not offend Qod, but you even try to practise virtues." (Diary, Notebook I, para. 68). “‘Tfus is a sign,' fie told me, *that Qod foves you very much and that dfe has great confidence in you, since 9fe is sending you such trials." (Diary, Notebook I, para. 77). He would no t allow the pen iten t, on any account, full of fear and doubt though she was, to miss Holy Com­ munion, and he tried to unload h e r mental tensions by carefully chosen penances. But the meaning of the instruc tions she was hearing, and even more so the penances, was not reaching S ister Faustina . She was sure th a t she had been unable to clarify the s ta te of h e r soul to h e r confessor, and th a t he therefore did not unde rs tand her. This is well illus tra ted by the reminiscences of two of h e r com­ panions, who shared the same dormitory. S ister Simone N. says, "It was almost the day o f confession, and after I had been to confession I came back to change for my duties in the kitchen. Shortly afterwards S ister Faustina also came back from confession, knelt before her bedside cupboard on which there stood a holy picture, p u t her hands on her head and began to weep loudly; her weeping became a shriek. I was sorry for her and ran at once to the Novice Mistress and told her what had happened. The Mistress ran a t once to our room, and I went straight to the kitchen. A fter a little time, S ister Faustina also came to the kitchen. You could see she had wept, but she was quite calm. I d id not ask her what d ifficu l­ ties she had, and she never told me o f them." (Archives of S.F., Recoil.). 86