Sister Faustina Kowalska: Her LIfe and MIssion

en ligh tenm en t takes place deep in the subconscious, b u t consciously the despa iring hum an being is con­ vinced of hav ing lost God and been condemned. Yet th e re begin to be glimpses, as the soul becomes more enlightened, which perm it h e r to rea lise God’s nearness , b u t these a re still in term ing led with recu r ren t dark clouds. These mystical n igh ts pass eventually, to be rewarded by th e loving union of the soul w ith God. The soul regains streng th , a t ta in s peace and is constantly recollected in God. God fills h e r so completely th a t He sha res with h e r some of His own n a tu re - the soul becomes transformed by the divine. Mystical n igh ts las t a very long time, prolonged th e more the soul in the to rm en t of purification and illum ination res is ts or avoids the guiding h an d of God. In S is te r F au s t in a ’s case the process was astonishingly brief: altoge ther eighteen months, for th e whole of the second yea r of th e novitiate and six mon ths a fte r h e r f i rs t Vows, i.e. th e years 1927 and 1928. This is w ha t she wrote on th e subject: “towards the end o f the f i r s t year o f my novitiate, darkness Began to cast its shadow over my soul. I feCt no consolation in prayer; I had to make a great effort to meditate; fea r Began to sweep over me. Qoing deeper into myseCf I couCd f i n d nothing But great misery. I could also see clearly the great holiness o f fo d . I d id not dare to raise my eyes to 9dim, But reduced myself to dust under Mis fe e t and Begged fo r mercy. M y sou l was in this state fo r almost si?c months. Our Beloved Mother Directress [Mary Joseph] encouraged me in these difficult moments. 'But this suffering Became greater and greater. 83