Sister Faustina Kowalska: Her LIfe and MIssion

I t is therefore no t a t all strange th a t Helena should he s ita te more and more. Had she made a m istake and was she no t in the r ig h t place for her? The Congrega­ tion of S isters of Our Lady of Mercy was an active community - was she to go to a contemplative Con­ gregation? Her doubts increased, fed by h e r inna te suspicion th a t th a t was th e case. After being th ree weeks in the Congregation, a crisis occurred and Helena had decided to leave. B u t although th e decision was taken , she kep t pu t t ing off th a t final ta lk to her superior. The reason was simple: she h ad no confidence in herself. The situa tion was too complicated and she could no t grasp the proper solution. After all, i t was Je su s H imself Who h ad led h e r to th is place! Where, then , lay the m istake? W ha t was the will of God in tend ing for her? She prayed fervently to be shown w ha t to do next. She wanted to fulfil God’s will, not he r own. Bu t among all these complicated problems she had lost her way. She was pe rs is ten t in prayer. She was like a child who keeps pestering un til he achieves w ha t he wants. Because God loves to be pestered so trus ting ly and continually, she did indeed receive the answ er she wanted. J u s t as on a previous occasion in h e r life, i t was Je su s H imself WTio cas t ou t h e r doubts. Helena gives an account of th is in h e r Diary: 7 entered the cett f u t t o f anguish, and discontent; I d id not know wha t to do zvith mysetf. I threiu mysetf headtong on the ground and Segan to pray fervent(y that I might come to know the raid o f (Jod... f t f te r a white a Brightness f i t te d my cett, and on the curtain I saw the very sorrowfut ‘Jace o f Jesus. There were open wounds on Jfis face , and targe tears were fa tting on my Bed­ spread. 9{pt knowing what a tt this meant I asked Jesus, 'Jesus, who has hurt y o u so?" JAnd Jesus sa id to me, 'It 63