Sister Faustina Kowalska: Her LIfe and MIssion

understandab le , therefore, t h a t we should ask to whal degree, if any, h e r D irectress contributed to th is crisis Mother Jan e was a senior nun aged 67, full of energy and with a well-developed sense of duty, b u t because for many years she had been Vicar General of hei Congregation, deputizing for th e Superior General in Poland, she was used to the absolute obedience of the Sisters, and i t had made h e r something of a despot Although she took a kindly care of the postu lan ts, she was sometimes heavy-handed in bending the young candidates to fit the convent framework, which, in the beginning, in many cases, was no t easy to accept. Hei method of education m ight, in the case of the more sensitive postu lan t, weight th e scales of m en ta l per­ severance down by insp iring anxiety and a lack oi self-confidence. Helena was ju s t such a pos tu lan t. I t is tru e th a t in general she found i t easy to obey instructions, b u t hers was no t a charac ter th a t could be moulded by force. The spiritual streng ths she h ad heretofore cultivated in he r life in the world were above all adap ted to resisting the world’s negative influences. She now had to t ra n s ­ form herse lf completely from one who resists to one who submits, which requ ires patience and time. “M the beginning o f my reCigioas life, suffering and adversities frigfitened and disheartened me,' wrote Sister F au s tina in h e r Diary (Notebook I, para. 56). This is an unusua l expression for her, because she had a sturdy charac ter capable of endurance. B u t in th is case there were too many difficulties a t once, which gave rise to a traum a , and, although th is was overcome, i t emerged years afterwards in the memory. S is te r Faus tina , even while urging h e r bro ther and s is te r to follow h e r into the religious life, could no t refra in from rem ark ing th a t the f irs t period a fte r en tering is hard , and the ad jus tm en t to the requ irem en ts of the religious life needs patience and time. (Archives of S.F., Recollections of h e r bro ther Mieczyslaw). 70