Sister Faustina Kowalska: Her LIfe and MIssion

se l f as zvell, Tor I s fa t t Cove yo u onCy as much as I shad come to knozv you . ftnct I shad despise myseCf only as much as I shad come to knozv my misery." (Diary, Notebook V, para . 1326). "In this profound silence, I am better able to judge the condition o f my soul. 9dy sou l is like clear zvater in zvhich I can see everything: both my misery and the vastness o f Qod’s graces. S ind ozving to this true knozvledge o f i tse l f my spirit is strengthened in deep humility.’ (Diary, Notebook V, para. 1336). "I zvant to come out o f this retreat a saint... in spite o f my zvretchednessj I zvant to become a saint, and I trust that Qod's mercy cam make- a saint even out o f such misery as I am, because I am utterly in good zvid. In spite o f a d my defects, I zvant to go on fighting like a holy soul and to comport myself like a holy soul. I zvid not be discouraged by anything, ju s t as nothing can discourage a sou l zvho is holy. I zvant to live and die like a holy soul, zvith my eyes f i x e d on you, Jesus, stretched out on the Cross, as the modelfo r my actions." (Diary, Notebook V, para. 1333). The motif of sanctity in those re tre a ts is the chief theme of S ister F au s tina ’s meditations. She tries to unders tand everything which is essential for the a tta inm en t of holiness, and also w ha t m igh t h inde r it. However, in order to unde rs tand her, we m u s t break off for a moment these r e t r e a t contemplations and clarify for ourselves which elements S ister F au s tin a a t p resen t though t were the most im po rtan t in sanctity, and which picture of sanctity looked most convincing to her. I t is 332