Sister Faustina Kowalska: Her LIfe and MIssion

dragged he rse lf to chapel in th e morning, a t leas t to Communion, for she had insufficient streng th to stay for the whole Mass. Her sp iritua l life, independently of he r exhaustion, had an especially intensive course: till m id-June, she made a three-day r e t re a t a t the request and under the direction of Je su s Himself, and for the la s t time in h e r life she renewed h e r religious vows. Completely unexpectedly, and w ithou t any comprehen­ sible reason, in the second h a lf of Ju n e the Diary suddenly breaks off. Nothing foretells its ending, and it lies incomplete. The tex t re la tes cu rren t m a tte rs , and awaits an en try for the nex t day. Bu t th e nex t day did not arrive. There m us t have been a very im po rtan t reason which caused S ister F au s t in a to p u t down her pen. She always trea ted h e r w riting as one of h e r basic duties. The las t entry she made in the Diary may give us some clue: "‘Light away, on the ‘Friday after Corpus Christi, I fe f t so unzvett that I thought the tongedfor moment zvas approaching. I had a high feve r and spat up much Stood during the night, y e t , I d id go to receive the Lord Jesus in the morning, Sut I coufd not stay fo r the Jfoty ‘Mass. In the afternoon, my temperature dropped suddenly to 35.8 C. I f e f t so zveah. that it zvas as i f everything inside me zvere dying. ‘Bu t zvhen I steeped mysetf in profound prayer, I understood that it zvas not yet the moment o f detiverance, Sut onfy a ctoser caff from my Bridegroom. ‘When I met zvith the Lord, I sa id to Jfim, "you are footing me, Jesus; yo u shozv me the open gate o f heaven, and again y o u teave me on earth. " ‘The Lord sa id to me, \When, in heaven, you see these present days, you zvid rejoice and zv id zvant to see as many o f them as pos­ sible." (Diary, Notebook VI, paras. 1786, 1787). 292